A few years ago while having an “office water cooler” conversation about feminism; I was questioned about my position on feminism. Until that moment I hadn’t given the meaning of feminism much thought. You see I was borne long after the first wave of the movement, and few years after the second wave of the 1960’s began. I am of the generation that reaped the benefits of Susan B. Anthony, Elizabeth Stanton and Gloria Steniem (to name a few). I never knew the time when women career choices were limited domesticated or clerical roles. Nor can I ever imagine women not having reproductive, social or economic rights. The very thought that there had to be a MOVEMENT . . . . . a movement where women had to fight for basic equality is inconceivable to me. So by default, I am a feminist--- there is no other way to be.
As I reflect on that water cooler moment I realize that I was somehow conflicted in my feelings about feminism. I knew my answer then may have sounded somewhat ambivalent, because I was immediately put on the spot by one of the ladies who practically barked in my face “You either are or you aren’t!” Now what could have possible created this conflict within me? I was in my early twenties then and I have since left the topic alone. This discussion I have learned can stir heated debates, which sometimes go on for hours with no resolution, only leaving its participants more frustrated than ever. My ambivalence has again re-surfaced; and now that I am older and bolder I haved decided to tackle it head on.
There is no doubt that most women believe in reproductive, voting, education, “equal pay for equal work”, affordable healthcare, affordable childcare, sexual harassment and exposing the frequency of sexual and domestic abuse rights. Frankly that’s the basis of feminism. It cannot be disputed or refuted it just makes sense!
However, after much research, I have discovered what creates the divide among women on this topic. “Separatist Feminism a form of Radical feminism”. Separatist feminism does not support heterosexual relationships due to its belief that the relationship between men and woman are irresolvable. Separatist feminists generally do not feel that men can make positive contributions to the feminist movement and that even well-intentioned men replicate the dynamics of patriarchy. Radical feminism has also argued that gendered and sexed identities, such as "man" and "woman", are social construct. Basically our roles are forced on us by society’s definition. This is the gray area that contemporary society has used to define and to some extent vilify feminism.
Ah ha! Herein lays the conflict. I believe that men are extremely important to our society. How can the relationship between men and women be irresolvable when we have been cohabiting together since the beginning of time? Sheer hogwash! This is truer with men and men relationships because it’s usually men who start the wars! Men-Women have to copulate in order to carry on the important function on earth; to continue the human race. That’s not irresolvable!
I also do not believe that gender identities are social constructs. This much I can tell you I have no desire to change the tires on my car (even though I know how to) or lay bricks. I don’t think my lack of desire is an oppressed feeling created by society. I just don’t have any interest in it and I’ll gladly have someone else tackle the task be it man or woman. Most women gravitate to certain roles as do most men not because society deems it but simply because it’s more comfortable. I am apt to believe that it could be more a genetic influence as oppose to social. So I'll start the debate here.
Do you think our most common gender roles are influenced by society or genetics?
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