Open Letters

Msogynism

Geez! What the hell are they thinking of? Imagine your employer penalizing you if you got pregnant. I wonder which high profile woman is going take this on?

BAGHDAD (Reuters) - The U.S. military commander in northern Iraq defended on Tuesday a new policy imposing strict penalties, including possible jail time, for troops who become pregnant or get other soldiers pregnant.

"In this 22,000-soldier task force, I need every soldier I've got, especially since we are facing a drawdown of forces during our mission," Major General Tony Cucolo, who commands U.S. soldiers in northern Iraq, said in a statement.

Cucolo's new directive, issued last month when he took command, lays out a long list of activities that could lead to court martial or criminal charges, from gambling to stealing historical artifacts, and applies only to his command.

The clause about pregnancy has garnered the most attention, affecting seven soldiers under Cucolo's command, according to military spokesman Major Jeff Allen. The command includes 1,682 female soldiers, Allen said.

There are some 115,000 U.S. troops in Iraq, a number set to drop to about 50,000 by the end of August next year as the U.S. military ends combat operations. Under a deal with Iraq, a full withdrawal of U.S. troops is due by the end of 2011.

U.S. Central Command rules do not prohibit "sexual contact between consenting, single servicemembers."

"I wanted to encourage my soldiers to think before they acted, and understand their behavior and actions have consequences -- all of their behavior.

Story here

via www.reuters.com

The Forgotten Continent

Is the world paying attention to what's happening in Guinea, Africa? 

"They were raping women publicly," opposition activist Mouctar Diallon said in an interview with French radio station RFI, adding that he had witnessed soldiers raping women with rifle butts during Monday's protests."

The Guinean Organization for Defense of Human Rights has reported over 157 people killed and more than 1,200 wounded. There has been no intervention to quell this uprising from the European Union or the USA, and France has suspended all military ties with Guinea. Why are these African countries forgotten? Recent history has shown the horrors of many wars throughout various African countries and it seems as if the world has once again turned a blind eye to what's going on. Rwanda's massacre wasn't long ago, regardless of the news report, Congo is far from stable and oh and let us not forget Darfur. 

Captain Moussa  Dadis Camara an army captain, seized power after the death of Guinea's long time leader  Lasana Conte last December, he promised democracy but has shown erratic behavior and very little power since. Announcing recently, that he intends to run for President has created these riots. He has little or no control over his military stating that " .....it's difficult to control soldiers when there was tension in the country"

Camara dude, you are the military and don't tell me that a woman who attends a protest ends up with a rifle in her vagina! Doesn't  this scream inhumane and outrageous to you? And I am left to believe that leaders within EU think this is ok too.

"The military is going into districts, looting goods and raping women," Mamadi Kaba, the head of the Guinean branch of the African Encounter for the Defence of Human Rights (RADDHO), told AFP......A doctor at a government hospital in Conakry said his wards looked like "a butchery"."

PEOPLE WE HAVE ANOTHER NEGLECTED AFRICAN COUNTRY ON OUR HANDS AND THIS WILL LATER CAUSE US EMBARRASSMENT AS THEY ALWAYS DO!

Read story here

Intergender Awareness

The moment the story aired about Caster Semenya, the South African athlete, I knew this was going to be an unfortunate mess for all involved. Let me just state, that I am amazed and disappointed at the IAAF, and the way they  humiliated Caster by publicly announcing their intentions of performing a gender test on her. Didn’t it occur to someone (anyone in that damn group) what these test meant and how the results could be emotionally devastating to the individual and her family?  How dumb could they be to subject someone to such public scrutiny?

 

I am almost certain that even though Caster exhibited masculine features they were no doubts in her and her family’s mind that she was indeed a female; after all she had female parts. Now that some results  are in, it turns out that she has internal testes and no ovaries, imagine the emotional confusion that she may be facing. How could they be so damn sensitive?

 

This isn’t uncommon as we would like to believe, we have all heard of hermaphrodites (the more PC term now is intersexuals or intergender depending on their medical complexity), it’s not a myth and there is nothing freakish about it; because it does happen!

 

A few years ago I joined a Mommy and Me class and befriended a wonderful woman. I knew that she had reproductive issues and her child was born to a surrogate. During one conversation she told me  both she and her husband went through a series of reproductive test only to find out that she had no ovaries (even though she produced eggs) and had abnormally high level of testosterone. She explained that she has never had a period and remembered being told by a doctor as teenager that she never  would. No one really explained it to her and she figured back then that "no menstruation " is OK with her, she was just as happy not to deal with this monthly issue. After finding out that she had eggs, they decided to harvest,  inseminate and use a surrogate to start a family. She told me about her emotional state during the process and what it meant and how she felt for 38 years prior to her daughter. I was so ecstatic at her happy ending story that I never gave it a second thought; until  Semenya story broke.  I remembered my friend’s story and was immediately outraged at how it was being handled. They made such a big deal out of it.

I am sure many fertility doctors can confirm that they deal with this as a reproductive issue more  than the IAAF would like us  to believe its a gender issue. Its  not until some women experience difficulty conceiving , that they find out about either chromosome issues or intergender issues. Without the voyeuristic eyes, an intersexual lives a regular life being who they want to be. Now Semenya has to deal with  a private issue under public scrutiny in addition to sorting out her feelings.  I only hope the best for her and may this bring the awareness to a condition that’s really not that uncommon.

Bee..have

A wise Latina woman knows not to let these fools to get under her skin

 

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Look at her face, behind that smile and calm measured tone, I hear  her voice saying behave chica, behave. These conservative boys are trying, yes indeed.

Gosh Darn it....Because she can!

Quite frankly I am taken aback with the whole controversy of First Lady Obama right to bear arms. I too like Mrs. Obama, love to wear sleeveless dresses or tops. It is a subtly way of showing femininity without being overtly sexy. A simple, elegant contemporary look for a woman her age. I shop for my dresses primarily at Ann Taylor and generally their dresses and tops are of sleeveless form with a conservative neckline and hem.  There is nothing vulgar about it; it's quite acceptable and in fact she always manages to look classy.

 

Now her official picture below is causing quite a storm. It’s a basic black dress, with conservative neckline and hem is well below her knees. It is accessorize with simple pearls. What’s the big deal? Is it because it’s very flattering on her and the chattering class wants to hate her so badly, that they must criticize. Or are we a nation of sexual repressed that even the bare arms stir sexual emotions? What’s next will we require our First Lady to wear Burqua’s? They are so darn petty!

What's wrong with this picture?

 

Some thing about this story is not sitting well with me. I’m watching CBS’ Early Show interview that included Drew Petersen ex-girlfriend, her father and their attorney. I couldn’t determine if the girl was drugged or pissed. At one point the attorney Lisa Bloom asked her a question, confirming some facts and this young lady just hung her head and refused to answer. Whose side is she on?

 

What is the mental state of woman who thinks it’s ok to date, then move in with a man who is a suspect in the murder of one of his wives and the disappearance of another? What is it that Drew Petersen saying/doing that a woman would say “He is so refreshing, I really I like him, I see a future here, I am going to move in and see where this goes”? Are you kidding me, have you seen this dude, he is creepy at every level.

 

He also seems to have a penchant for young girls. This woman claimed that she has known him since she was 15 years old. He met his missing wife when she was also a teenager. Is there an investigation for possible statutory rape? I’m sure they wouldn’t have to look too hard to find something. I also question the apparent reluctance of the Bolingbrook, IL police department to do something. What the hell is going on here?

Let's think about it for a minute...

...I saw this video over at Screed a few weeks ago and I haven’t been able to shake it.

Here we have a bunch of people who are incapable following a logical thought through to its conclusion. Let’s play devil’s advocate here, we repeal Roe vs. Wade, and abortion is now illegal.  Let put some thought in the legality of it all.

• How much time should a woman serve if she has an abortion?
• Equally important how much time should the partner who got her pregnant serve? He aided and abetted. (Shares equal responsibility in creating the situation that ultimately resulted in a crime)
• If you find out that a friend and or family member had an abortion, what is your responsibility, turn them in? If not, are you accessory after the fact?
• Clinicians, yep guilty, accessory before the fact, as well as aided and abetted
• The person who assisted in taking her to and from the abortion, yep guilty too.

I could go on and show you how the hands of justice will reach far and wide, taking on a cancerous form. I wondered how many Pro-Lifer have given this much thought. According to the supporters on the video, this should be illegal because it’s killing a human being. However, the woman should be counseled and left to deal with her conscience and God. Why isn’t this woman serving a life sentence or sentence death? An abortion is usually performed a few weeks after the doctor confirms pregnancy. Which means that she had time to think and followed through anyway…premeditated right?

Now here is also another can of worms I’ll open and toss it far and wide. Why don’t we just release criminals currently serving term for killing a human being? Why don’t we just counsel them then let them go to deal with their conscience and God? Or are you saying that the life of a baby is worth less than someone who is older?  So if you kill someone older you go to jail, but a fetus you can just think about it. I can imagine the amount of criminals serving time now making that argument. 

So for crying out loud, before you grab a picket sign and start chanting….think!

Gender Roles

Just a quick follow up to the last post, debating whether gender roles were influenced by society or genetics. Here is a recent observation.

Yesterday my son had a play date where he was the only boy present. The host of play-date pulled out all her daughter’s toys which mostly consisted of dolls and their sundries. Among them were a few electronic toys such a cell phone and a V-Tech computer. As we watched the kids played for 2 hours, not once did my 20 month old son played with a doll. It would not have bothered me, since I am under the impression that toddlers at this age will play with items indiscriminately. As the other little girls fought over the dolls and such, my boy was just happy tinkering away at the buttons and toys that made a racket. I have never discouraged him from playing with any toys nor is he at the age for me to reinforce choices, however it made me think. .. Was his choice in entertainment genetically influenced?

The Feminism Debate

A few years ago while having an “office water cooler” conversation about feminism; I was questioned about my position on feminism. Until that moment I hadn’t given the meaning of feminism much thought.  You see I was borne long after the first wave of the movement, and few years after the second wave of the 1960’s began. I am of the generation that reaped the benefits of Susan B. Anthony, Elizabeth Stanton and Gloria Steniem (to name a few).  I never knew the time when women career choices were limited domesticated or clerical roles.  Nor can I ever imagine women not having reproductive, social or economic rights. The very thought that there had to be a MOVEMENT . . . . . a movement where women had to fight for basic equality is inconceivable to me. So by default, I am a feminist--- there is no other way to be.   

As I reflect on that water cooler moment I realize that I was somehow conflicted in my feelings about feminism. I knew my answer then may have sounded somewhat ambivalent, because I was immediately put on the spot by one of the ladies who practically barked in my face “You either are or you aren’t!”  Now what could have possible created this conflict within me? I was in my early twenties then and I have since left the topic alone. This discussion I have learned can stir heated debates, which sometimes go on for hours with no resolution, only leaving its participants more frustrated than ever. My ambivalence has again re-surfaced; and now that I am older and bolder I haved decided to tackle it head on. 

There is no doubt that most women believe in reproductive, voting, education, “equal pay for equal work”, affordable healthcare, affordable childcare, sexual harassment and exposing the frequency of sexual and domestic abuse rights.   Frankly that’s the basis of feminism. It cannot be disputed or refuted it just makes sense! 

However, after much research, I have discovered what creates the divide among women on this topic.  “Separatist Feminism a form of Radical feminism”. Separatist feminism does not support heterosexual relationships due to its belief that the relationship between men and woman are irresolvable. Separatist feminists generally do not feel that men can make positive contributions to the feminist movement and that even well-intentioned men replicate the dynamics of patriarchy. Radical feminism has also argued that gendered and sexed identities, such as "man" and "woman", are social construct. Basically our roles are forced on us by society’s definition. This is the gray area that contemporary society has used to define and to some extent vilify feminism. 

Ah ha! Herein lays the conflict. I believe that men are extremely important to our society. How can the relationship between men and women be irresolvable when we have been cohabiting together since the beginning of time? Sheer hogwash! This is truer with men and men relationships because it’s usually men who start the wars!  Men-Women have to copulate in order to carry on the important function on earth; to continue the human race. That’s not irresolvable! 

I also do not believe that gender identities are social constructs. This much I can tell you I have no desire to change the tires on my car (even though I know how to) or lay bricks. I don’t think my lack of desire is an oppressed feeling created by society. I just don’t have any interest in it and I’ll gladly have someone else tackle the task be it man or woman. Most women gravitate to certain roles as do most men not because society deems it but simply because it’s more comfortable. I am apt to believe that it could be more a genetic influence as oppose to social. So I'll start the debate here. 

Do you think our most common gender roles are influenced by society or genetics?